It’s difficult when we get tied up in the craziness of day to day life to remember that we need to take care of ourselves. If you’ve ever been too busy to eat during the day or if you have ever forgone sleep in lieu of something else, you’ll know that it’s far too easy to forget that we need to treat ourselves kindly.

One of my favorite things that I’ve ever been told about treating myself kindly was, “would you ever say the things you’re telling yourself to your little sister or best friend?” If you wouldn’t say it to someone else, you shouldn’t be saying it to yourself; it’s extremely important to make yourself a priority and be your own best friend. This is always something that I’ve had a hard time with, personally.

I have no problem being compassionate to the people in my life and supporting them when they go through tough times but for some reason, the second that it is me that’s struggling, suddenly I’m overreacting and it’s not important. That is one thing that I am actively trying to change about myself in the new year. I want to be able to treat myself with the same love and respect that I treat others. It’s been a long journey and while I still have a long way to go, I have compiled a list of things I can do when I’m feeling down on myself.

Here are some of the things that I do to take care of myself and remind myself that I am my own priority.

1. Cut out toxic relationships. I know this is a big one to start with but honestly it has truly made such a difference in my life. I didn’t realize how many people that I had in my life who weren’t good for me until after I let them go. Once that toxicity was out of my life, I immediately started feeling better, not only about myself but about my life in general. There are different types of toxic relationships, some easier to recognize than others. Obviously, people who are abusive, may put you down, or make you feel bad about yourself are probably people that you should consider removing from your life. However, a lot of us don’t think about the other kind of toxic relationship, which is that of the energy vampire. These people seem to be there for you as long as you are supporting them; they make empty promises about doing the same for you but when the time comes when you need support, they’re nowhere to be found. Any kind of relationship should be a two way street and while it won’t always be equal, because there will be times when you need to lean on each other for support, if someone just seems to be taking while giving nothing back, it might be time to let them go.
2. Write it out. Sometimes I can get overwhelmed with everything that I need to do in a day or my brain gets cluttered with anxious thoughts and worries and when that happens I find that writing down what I’m thinking and feeling helps me sort everything out. That can look like many different things, it can look like writing down a stream of consciousness on paper, typing up a blog post recounting your day, or drawing out your feelings. But something that I find to be particularly helpful are intention or prompted journals; these can be useful not only in setting your intention for the day but also helping you figure out something to write about. It’s not always easy just to sit down and write about your feelings, so sometimes it’s helpful to have a prompt. I recently purchased one of these for my mom for Christmas this year since she’s so stressed out all the time. It’s called “Zen as F*ck: A Journal for Practicing the Mindful Art of Not Giving a Sh*t” and it’s truly a fantastic tool for getting out of your head and learning to cut yourself some slack.
3. Taking time for yourself. When I was at my most stressed out, it was partly because I wasn’t taking the time I needed to do the things I enjoyed. There was a period of time when I totally forgot to do any of my hobbies to the point where I forgot what they were. It’s great to spend time with people you love and do work that you’re passionate about but part of self care is taking the time to do the things you want to do. Take the time to reconnect with yourself and remember the things that you like to do but maybe haven’t done in a while.
4. Pamper yourself every now and then. Most of us don’t have time to take luxurious bubble baths every day to wind down or have the money to go get weekly manicures. But that doesn’t mean that you can’t pamper yourself every now and then; part of self care is putting yourself in a stable head space mentally but another part of it is taking care of your body. Some of the things that I will do for myself are; painting my nails, maintaining skincare routines, and using soap that smells really good while I’m showering. Pampering yourself does not have to be expensive or time consuming; something in expensive and quick that I will do for myself sometimes is use a sheet mask. Sheet masks are a nice way to relax and unwind at the end of the day and take care of my skin. They only take between 15-20 minutes usually and they tend to be pretty inexpensive; in fact you can get 12 different kinds of sheet masks for $9.80 here, in addition to many other places!
5. Practice the power of intention. A little while ago, I wrote an article on what the power of intention is and how to use it in your day to day life, which you can read in full here, if you’d like. In the article I talk about the power of intention in relation to my practice of witchcraft but honestly it can be used in any type of situation witchcraft or not. Understanding that you have the power to set the mood for your day and make choices to change your life in the direction you want to go in is one of the most powerful changes you can make.

I’m always looking for more ways to better take care of myself and help others do the same, so if I’ve missed something or you have a suggestion please comment below! I’d love to know. 🙂